Spam ([info]madbodger) wrote,
@ 2009-07-18 21:47:00
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Current location:Purcellville, VA
Current mood:amused
Current music:Too Much Pressure-Selecter-Suited & Booted

Your Co-Worker could be a Space Alien!
Years ago, my friends and I found this quiz (by Michael Cassels of the National Enquirer) very amusing, as we're all apparently space aliens. So I dug up a copy for your edification.

Many Americans work side by side with space aliens who look human — but you can spot these visitors by looking for certain tip-offs, say experts.

They listed 10 signs to watch for:

  1. Odd or mismatched clothes. “Often space aliens don’t fully understand the different styles, so they wear combinations that are in bad taste, such as checked pants with a striped shirt or a tuxedo jacket with blue jeans or sneakers,” noted Brad Steiger, a renowned UFO investigator and author.
  2. Strange diet or unusual eating habits. Space aliens might eat French fries with a spoon or gobble down large amounts of pills, the experts say.
  3. Bizarre sense of humor. Space aliens who don’t understand earthly humor may laugh during a serious company training film or tell jokes that no one understands, said Steiger.
  4. Takes frequent sick days. A space alien might need extra time off to “rejuvenate its energy,” said Dr. Thomas Easton, a theoretical biologist and futurist.
  5. Keeps a written or tape recorded diary. “Aliens are constantly gathering information.” said Steiger.
  6. Misuses everday items. “A space alien may use correction fluid to paint its nails,” said Steiger.
  7. Constant questioning about customs of co–workers. Space aliens who are trying to learn about earth culture might ask questions that seem stupid, Easton said. “For example, a co-worker may ask why so many Americans picnic on the Fourth of July,” noted Steiger.
  8. Secretive about personal life–style and home. “An alien won’t discuss domestic details or talk about what it does at night or on weekends,” said Steiger.
  9. Frequently talks to himself. “An alien may not be used to speaking as we do,so an alien may practice speaking,” Steiger noted.
  10. Displays a change of mood or physical reaction when near certain high–tech hardware. “An alien may experience a mood change when a microwave oven is turned on,” said Steiger.

The experts pointed out that a co–worker would have to display most if not all of these traits before you can positively identify him as a space alien.



(10 comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]bikergeek
2009-07-19 01:50 am UTC (link)
Based on that checklist I'm probably a space alien.

(Reply to this)


[info]deza
2009-07-19 01:53 am UTC (link)
Dammit, they're on to me!
*flees*

(Reply to this)


[info]redaxe
2009-07-19 01:57 am UTC (link)
I am so busted!

(Reply to this)


[info]swashbuckler332
2009-07-19 02:10 am UTC (link)
Yeah, me too.

(Reply to this)


[info]dianec42
2009-07-19 02:15 am UTC (link)
I swear I've seen that one before! Thought it was the Weekly World News though... and probably about 20 years ago...

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]bikergeek
2009-07-19 03:03 am UTC (link)
yeah, I think I saw that same article in the WWN. I remember laughing at it with my friends at the time.

I miss the WWN. That "paper" was a riot.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]madbodger
2009-07-19 04:05 am UTC (link)
Yeah, I think you were one of the people who was laughing at it with me. I had also thought WWN and about that long ago, but maybe these things were passed around and republished a lot, or the site where I found it was misattributed.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


[info]supremeherptile
2009-07-19 03:48 am UTC (link)
We're going to have to kill you now.

(Reply to this)


[info]jim_p
2009-07-19 05:15 am UTC (link)
So if we're all space aliens, when the frell is the mothership going to get here and take us off this godforsaken mudball?

(Reply to this)


[info]ericavdg
2009-07-20 05:01 am UTC (link)
Thomas Easton is also a science fiction writer. I cited his work in my BioScience Magazine article, "Biology in science fiction." I wonder if he knew who else was quoting him!

Looking over the criteria, I guess I'm an alien, too. So are most of my friends. I could cite examples, but I don't want to blow anyone's cover.

(Reply to this)


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